BizHat.com > BizHat.com > Jokes > Answer Machine Jokes
Answering Machine Message - 6
Hi!! You've reached Janet and Chris's room.
We're not in right now.
If this is our parents, we're at the library studying. Yeah, yeah, that's it, that's the ticket.
If this is John, Chris is out with the girls at the party. Yeah, that's it.
If this is any one else, we're at a party and you're not. Yeah, a party with the president. Yeah and the... Pope. Yeah that's it.
(Loud sounds of a massive battle; calm voice:) Hello! Due to the breakdown in the 452nd truce, the inhabitants of village 286-3589 are cowering in their bomb shelters. However, if you leave your name, number, and a message, any survivors will get back to you when the 453rd truce begins.
Please leave your name, phone number, the time you called, and your favorite color of shirts. We'll get back to you if we like the color.
John: Brad, will you get the phone?
Brad: (Sound of frantically clattering keyboard.) I can't! I'm playing Omega!
John: Ambar, will you get the phone?
Ambar: I can't! I'm late for work! (Sound of slamming door.)
John: Aimee, will you get the phone?
Aimee: (Sound of running water.) I can't! I'm in the shower!
John: Glenn, will you get the -- (disgusted) Ah, Glenn's in Denver. Please leave a message.
Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit":
Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello,
No one's here, no one's home,
Leave a message, at the tone.
Don't feel stupid, it's no big fuss,
Leave a message, you can reach us.