Answering Machine Message - 3

How do you leave a message on this thing?
 
I can't understand the instructions.
 
Hello. Testing 1 2 3. I wonder what happens if I touch this... YOW!

You know what I hate about answering machine messages?
 
They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren't in, leave a message."
 
That's why I've decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me...

Next Message

Yes, I finally got an answering machine.
 
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! All-e-lu-ia!
 
Please leave a message at the tone.

Next Message

Way back inna winner of fifty-two, we didn' have fanshy gadjets like anshering machine.
 
You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home.
 
Now, shum people, dey shay dey don' like 'em, but I shay it'll shave you a lotta trouble if you just leave a message. Thanksh a lot.

Next Message

"Camptown Races": I can't come to the telephone; doo-dah, doo-dah. Leave your message when you hear the tone; oh, de doo-dah day. Might be gone all night... Might be gone all day... So leave a message when you hear the tone. I'll call you back someday...